Recently, when discussing stand-up comedy with a writer friend, he revealed that more than 40 years ago he’d wanted to be a comedian.
As the first step to achieving his ambition, he entered a talent competition.
It didn’t work out well.
But, he recounted the experience with such candid good humour, I’m passing it on as a cautionary tale to anyone thinking of taking up comedy as a career.
In 1982, while holding down a nine-to-five job, he’d had some success writing jokes for TV entertainment shows, but hadn’t sold one for more than a year.
Eager to prove he hadn’t ‘lost’ his talent for creating humour, when he saw an advertisement in his local paper for a ‘Grand Talent Contest’ at the local theatre, he applied, started writing an act and spent two months rehearsing it every night after work and at weekends.
On the first heat he was booked to appear in, although terrified, his nerves didn’t fail him and he immediately started getting laughs, which continued for the next 15 minutes.
He came second, won £40 and was asked to return for the final two weeks later.
Unfortunately he was inexperienced. Any professional comedian would have advised him to stick to the act that he’d spent two months learning, but he wrote and attempted to learn a brand new 15-minute act in a fortnight!
At the final, the moment he walked on stage his mind went blank and he forgot his opening line, then bungled the next joke.
For comedians, a minute on stage without a laugh is an eternity.
Panicking, he brought forward what he thought was a surefire gag from the end of his act, delivered it badly and (with his routine now hopelessly out of order) he had no idea what his next line was.
So he said, “Goodnight”, walked off to the sound of his own footsteps, and went home!
Looking back, he has no regrets, believing the experience helped sharpen his writing skills.
But, occasionally, he does wonder what would have happened if he had stuck to the act that won him £40!