Residents of Betws may wish to check their postboxes, doorbells, and possibly their long-lost relatives, as a curious phenomenon has swept the village in the run-up to local elections: sudden, intense popularity.
One local resident (who asked to remain anonymous, presumably to avoid further “friendship”) reports an unprecedented surge in attention from councillors (and would-be Senedd members) of every political persuasion.
“It’s been relentless,” they said. “They’re smiling, waving, asking about my bins, my views, my hopes, my dreams. I had one ask how my hydrangeas were doing. I don’t ‘have’ hydrangeas.”
The resident, previously known mainly to the people at the corner shop and one mildly judgmental pigeon, admits confusion.
“I don’t know these people. Last month, if I tripped in the street, they’d have stepped over me. Now they’re offering to help me ‘not’ trip in the future. It’s suspicious.”
Eyewitnesses confirm sightings of candidates appearing at improbable moments, emerging from behind hedges, materialising near recycling boxes, and once, reportedly, “just . . .  already sitting in the living room.”
Local experts have suggested the attention may be linked to the upcoming elections, though this remains unconfirmed by the councillors themselves, who insist they’ve “always cared deeply” about residents they met approximately six minutes ago.
“I mean, don’t get me wrong,” the resident added. “It’s lovely. I’ve never felt so important. If this is what winning the lottery feels like, I’d recommend it, though I assume the free pens will eventually stop.”
As polling day approaches, villagers are advised to remain calm, accept any complimentary leaflets with grace, and remember: after the votes are counted, it may once again be just you, the corner shop, and that pigeon.

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